


Wild Is The Wind

by colorfulcharades, Isabelu_u



Series: Edgeless Melody [2]
Category: Thunderbolt Fantasy 東離劍遊紀 (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Comfort, Fluff, Light Angst, M/M, Nostalgia, Reminiscing, Reunions, that little apology isn't enought Shang
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-08
Updated: 2018-12-08
Packaged: 2019-09-14 01:02:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,395
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16903140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/colorfulcharades/pseuds/colorfulcharades, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Isabelu_u/pseuds/Isabelu_u
Summary: Even the night itself seemed to be quietly waiting for him to finally say everything properly. And, all be damned, it was so hard.





	Wild Is The Wind

The Princess of Cruelty's attack has passed and now Shang and Lang were traveling together again, wandering in the last traces of the night, leaving the fortress behind. They found each other only a few hours ago, and yet they were already in such a distressful situation. It brought back so many memories, so many different feelings flooding his chest as they walked silently through the woods. It wasn't good, they should probably take this time to rest. The villain had retreated but would certainly find them again during the day and they needed to be ready for it. And yet he kept walking because his mind couldn't keep still either. 

The moment when they met again that night kept repeating itself in Shang's mind. He felt that familiar thrill, that joy and relief only the sight of his partner could give him. Be it during battle or sharing peaceful moments, Lang was always a soothing image, a hand over his own telling him he wasn't alone, that he could trust and be trusted, that he deserved that trust. Yet at the same time he felt an overwhelming guilt for leaving him behind, for having been the one to break that trust, the one to take the hand away from such a miraculous bond.

He had felt this guilt so strongly as he crossed the wasteland, each step hurting harder with the weight of his betrayal, further away from him, each step a needle in his tongue if they ever were to meet again. How would he face him if they were to meet again? The thought had worried Shang's mind for a very long time until he convinced himself that it was never going to happen, that Lang had probably moved on and his guilt was pointless, just another reason, another proof that he had to keep on walking, even faster, to protect himself and others from his treacherous self. 

Yet there he was. Waiting for him. Standing just like before, like that day, like always on his mind, waking him up from the sedative state his feelings for him had been into. He was looking at him, and he looked like he felt the same, but he also looked hurt and that, that was all Shang had feared for so many nights finally unfolding in front of him.

So he ran.

Yes it was so necessary to run, the situation was catastrophic, yet a part of his heart knew why his legs where so light. 

_Dammit. I’m not ready for this._

And so, they fought the Princess of Cruelty.

And when he saw Lang in that moment, fighting just the same as back then, Shang felt his hearbeat running wild, his past satisfaction and never ending admiration at his partner's skills burning brightly within him. It was all so untouched, so alive inside himself that Shang couldn't believe it. And now that they were alone, walking the same path once again, it was impossible to run from it.

Even Ling Ya was silent now. He had been talking a lot about their travel, the Princess of Cruelty. Asking all the questions Lang wasn't asking, saying all the words Lang wasn't saying to him.  
And Shang kept informing the pipa, pretending he didn't have to say anything else. 

But he knew he had to.

Not doing so was even worse, he thought, and Ling Ya probably felt it too for it kept quietly waiting for Shang to start. Even the night itself seemed to be quietly waiting for him to finally say everything properly. And, all be damned, it was so hard.

The wind was blowing strongly, the rain had stopped but something felt like it wasn't over yet now. They had to rest for a minute. Shang had to stop, to reconsider, to get his thoughts in order for just a small bit. The sound of rustling leaves and the earthy smell the rain had left behind where calling for him to take this moment to rest, to finally grasp the chance and do things right. The shining, full moon was bathing everything with her pale light, watching him, observing quietly. He saw a fallen tree near the path they were walking on and decided they could perfectly sit there and discuss everything. To be fair, any place would have been alright. He needed to get his thoughts out right now.

 

"Lang". 

He called, and his tongue felt a lot heavier than usual.  
"Let's sit here for a while".  
A lump in his throat. He had to face this.  
"I need to talk to you".

 

Lang turned around and kept his beautiful eyes of faded emerald looking straight into his own. 

 

_Why?_

They kept asking, and Shang had to answer.

\------

"I need to talk to you".  
Lang turned around and saw the older man's eyes fixed in him, his features full of resolution and anxiety. He was ready to hear him, he always had been, ever since the day Shang left. He felt lonely and betrayed, but he knew that, within him, all he wanted was to understand. Shang had, until that last moment, kept their bond as a sacred and precious thing. Lang had felt their hearts connected and trusted his life in Shang's hands thousands of times, without even the slightest questioning. At last, as the windy night kept telling them to rest, Shang had decided to give Lang the answer, one that he needed but he couldn't ask for, that needed to be delivered on it’s own accord.

He sat next to him, and at first, his eyes were looking away, the same as when he was apologizing earlier, but as he started talking he focused his grey eyes on Lang.

 

"I'm sorry... I should have told you. I should have made things... Better for us".

 

Lang couldn't look away from Shang's pained expression, his regret so visible, so intense, even Ling Ya on his back wasn't making fun of it.  
Lang kept listening, he needed to hear this, to see this.  
And suddenly, like a gentle touch of warm breeze, he felt Shang's hand on his shoulder. Such a simple act, and yet so full of memories, so intense for his body it sent shivers down his spine. He was *here*. This small warmth in Lang's shoulder was his. 

 

"I'm sorry, Lang. I thought I had to protect you. But in all that, I ended up hurting you. I'm so sorry".

 

Lang just kept looking at him, still in disbelief that this instant, this moment was actually happening, until he felt a lonely tear falling down his cheek. He had swore to himself too many times that he wasn't going to get emotional this time, that he had managed to control some things about himself a bit more. Yet here he was, again, and he wasn't going to try to speak, he knew how his voice would sound like.

So Ling Ya, ever the witty one, started in his place.

"It wasn't easy in Xi You either after you went away. You left quite a mess. Those guys weren't happy with you just dissapearing, this guy had t-"

 

"I missed you" Lang interrupted. His voice so brittle and soft it took both Shang and Ling Ya by surprise. The musician held Shang's stare and, as they both silently looked at each other's eyes, he felt the grip in his shoulder grow tighter. His voice was quicker than his clouded mind.

"If we ever have to part again, face me".

 

Shang's eyes were bearing a strange glow to them now, too. Tears held back, as it was usually the case with him. It was so impossible to look away.

 

"Understood" he said. 

 

Dawn was starting to paint it's colors on the trees and the wind kept blowing strongly, yet the light of day has found them together now, after all this time. Together and about to cry. Shang's eyes stopped at Lang's lips for a few seconds. They both felt it, but they both knew it was too soon. They had time. Now they were in the same path again. 

But for how long?

Lang closed his eyes and Shang, again, understood.

The hand on his shoulder moved behind his neck and tenderly pulled him close.

And the taste of a sacred memory, that felt the same as before, too.

**Author's Note:**

> I HOPE YOU LIKED IT!!  
> This is my first fic ever and I'm so scared!! I thank with all my heart the help of the perfect colorfulcharades for this! English is not my first language and i'm a coward so i really needed her help to do this!!
> 
> THANK YOU FOR READING I LOVE YOU!! I PROMISE THE NEXT ONE WILL BE BETTER!!
> 
> Also yes, the title is a motherfucking David Bowie reference.


End file.
